Where lies CHASING BOOK SALES LAND?

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We have been receiving communiqués querying where lies this little Fiefdom of Chasing Book Sales Land.

It’s a minor fiefdom abutting The Consort’s petty fiefdom of Why don’t you give it away land.

Both are within the borders of the minor kingdom of The Bush Capital, which itself sits within the realm of New South Wales.

It is part of the mighty island nation of Australia that occupies a great swathe of the southern regions.

A long and perilous journey is required to reach its shores but if you ever undertake the arduous trip and travel on to Chasing Book Sales Land you will receive a warm welcome from its inhabitants.

Please note that gifts for My Fiefdomness are customary.

Where lies Chasing book sales land?

Foul play in CHASING BOOK SALES LAND

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It’s a sad day in Chasing book sales land.

We have lost one of our favourite citizens.

The Consort found Frank the Legless Lizard at the bottom of the palace’s outdoor swimming pool this morning. The Consort was quick to scoop Frank out but felt he was past mouth-to-mouth resuscitation and CPR.

Lolly Legless Lizard

The Consort and I have our suspicions as to the culprit, but without evidence or witnesses we must remain silent and impartial.

Our suspicions turned immediately in Lolly Lizard’s direction.

Why? Because in the past weeks The Fiefdom has been preparing to honour My Fiefdomness with a lifetime literature award in recognition of the wealth my published endeavours have brought to The Fiefdom.

And because Frank was rather special, as well as being a favourite, The Consort thought he was the perfect choice to present the award.

Why was Frank special? Well, because he was a legless lizard and the only one in Chasing books sales land. He has cousins further afield but collectively they are an endangered species. Lolly had objected initially but withdrew it after Egbert the Rosella voiced the opinion that Frank was the most appropriate choice.

When we spied Lolly in the garden later in the morning we felt he had a very satisfied look in his eye.

Lolly Lizard

The Consort stepped in to do the honours at the award ceremony.

Rest in peace, Frank.

Egbert Rosella of CHASING BOOK SALES LAND

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I thought I’d take the opportunity to introduce you to Egbert Rosella, one of my most loyal subjects, because he’s been on my mind lately.

Hang on, I hear you say, in a past communiqué you indicated you were alone in Chasing book sales land.

Yes, forgive me, I did give that impression.

But, in fact, my tiny fiefdom is teeming with loyal subjects. This chap, Egbert, his better half, plus another pair, live in the hollows of a tree next door to the palace.

Egbert 1

But loyal though they be, they’re not above making complaint when they feel it’s warranted.

They’re rather partial to the kitchen garden rosehips as they start to ripen in summer. But the yearly ripening usually coincides with the depletion of rosehip jam in the fiefdom’s larder. So to ensure supply the bushes are netted.

The little chaps do their best to overcome the obstacle. I’m a benevolent despot but I have been known to gesticulate rather wildly in my efforts to let them know I’m not at all pleased.

Egbert 2 Egbert 3

I don’t show favouritism of course, what benevolent despot worth their salt would? But I do have a soft spot for Egbert who has a touch more gumption than the rest of his family and mates.

I had to hide a smile this year when he appeared at the window and tapped with his beak to gain my attention: ‘Er, ahem, Your Fiefdomness, the rosehips, they appear to be netted.’

Egbert 4

Admiring his pluck I pointed him in the direction of the lavender, because he and his family and mates are also very fond of that. They’ve been known to gorge themselves until they resemble little round balls!

Egbert 5 Egbert 6

 

So, yes, Chasing book sales land does have residents. Sadly for them none of them read, therefore none of them know what fine literature they’re missing out on by not reading Her Fiefdomness’ books.

 

The Consort of CHASING BOOK SALES LAND

Today I went for a walk around The Fiefdom.
I hadn’t done so for a while so thought I’d better check that all is well. The Consort accompanied me.
Wait on, I hear you say, Consort? You haven’t mentioned him before, Your Fiefdomness.


 

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No, well, that’s because he doesn’t visit often. To give you an amazingly brief history of Chasing book sales land, it came into being 40 years ago and for most of those years The Consort did co-habit. But recently he moved to Why not give it away land, another petty fiefdom that shares a border with mine.

So far The Consort has been pretty benign with his change of stance. There’s no looming war or hostile takeover on the horizon. Long may that last.

Anyway, getting back to our perambulation. It had been raining all day and we took the chance for the walk when it eased. The smell of eucalypt hung heavy in the air. Very pleasant indeed. Conducive to discussion of fiefdom business.

The Consort

Official court likeness of The Consort

Yes, there is a wine glass in one hand and camera in the other. Apart from his official role of providing gravitas to My Fiefdomness, his primary purpose is to assess and chose wines for the palace cellars and photograph official happenings.

He does a sterling job of both.